My fur baby, Bailey is a 11 year old terrier-dachshund mix. He struggled when baby Joey was born with anxiety/nervousness. He would pace and quietly whine whenever Joey would cry. It was so hard to watch, but eventually Bailey learned that Joey was here to stay. Now that Joey is eating solids, Bailey is quite happy to clean up after him 3 times a day.
On a recent Sunday afternoon, I had plans to go to the park to meet a few other mom friends and babies. I made sure to leave Bailey at home with the radio on just in case he got particularly anxious. I’m not sure if it helps, but I like to think it does.
When we came back, we were greeted happily by Bailey’s wagging tail, and we all played for a bit in the living room. Well, really Bailey just supervises the play and Joey occasionally tries to pet him. Afterwards, since it was also garbage night, I cleaned out the refrigerator and left the kitchen garbage out so I wouldn’t forget to bring it down to the big can. (My mommy brain is intense lately!) I then went to put Joey down for afternoon nap and gave Bailey a treat, which is our standard routine.
Joey is teething, and it took a while to get him settled in his crib. So, I came out after 30 minutes and was ready to lay on the couch and watch Bravo (my guilty pleasure) when I noticed Bailey was cowering under the table… then I saw the kitchen floor! There was garbage EVERYWHERE! He had not only knocked over the tall garbage but spread it all over the kitchen floor. Corn on the cob, avocado, baby wipes and more were under the cabinets from one end of the kitchen to the next. I stood there wanting to scream but knew the baby was asleep! I had had it, I was DONE! I had spent all weekend with Joey struggling to get him to nap in his crib, and I was so sore and exhausted. I needed a nap! But, NO, I now had to get on the floor and pick up as much as possible with my hands because the vacuum would’ve definitely woke the baby. I CRIED! I CRIED A LOT! Sitting on the kitchen floor, sobbing the ugly cry, I mourned the loss of sleep over the last (almost) year of Joey’s life.
Just 10 minutes in, Joey woke up screaming in his crib yelling “MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA.” I quickly turned on the vacuum and did the best I could to get the garbage off the floor. Did I mention my Joey is sound sensitive! The vacuum caused him to have a full blown melt down himself…huge tears, shaking, screaming and crying. I was so mad at Bailey, my first baby. I wanted to put him outside. But he was punishing himself, still cowering under the table. I called my mom crying, went to get Joey, and then we all finally calmed down.
This has taught me a few things…
- Never leave the garbage can out because my little Bailey can’t be trusted!
- It is ok to be DONE. It is perfectly normal to reach the point where you just can’t take anymore. Cry. Take a few minutes to yourself, eat some chocolate, or do whatever you need to do. Have your Mommy Meltdown Moment. You earned these moments! You grew a HUMAN FOR GOODNESS SAKE!
- Move on. Things happen, and I wasn’t going to let the trash all over the floor ruin the rest of our day/evening. I accepted the fact that Bailey clearly needed more attention than he was receiving due to now sharing me with his human brother. After all, Bailey was here first.